F-5 on the ground...continued

Having picked the little silver slivers out of the carpet, I tucked myself back into bed once again. I heard TJ coming and going from my bedroom, the TV murmuring in the background, her giving instructions to imaginary friends and then quiet. A few minutes later, still quiet. Then the pat pat pat of bare feet from the living room to the kitchen, running water . . . quiet. I fell back into a fevered sleep and when I awoke . . . still quiet. Once again I roused myself and shuffled into the kitchen. "TJ," I called quietly. "What Momma." Very controlled and very quietly I asked, "What have you been doing?" Blue water pooled my kitchen and a trail of splashes led through the dining room into the living room. Her child sized chair pulled up to the counter gave her ample height to fill the round, plastic container of blue water that sat precipitously on the edge of the counter. Wads of fading blue paper drowned and settled to the bottom. I made my way into the living room to see TJ sitting at her small table intently covering a torn piece of paper with a blue marker. "Well, Momma, I am tie dying and this is how you do it. Now watch and learn. . . " I wasn't listening. When she began her lesson I went directly to prayer. "God I am sick and tired. I have no help today. Tj is into everything and won't sit and watch TV like other children. I am out of patience; there is nothing left in me and the day is not half over. I am too old to parent a five year old, even when I am healthy." "Follow me," TJ instructed and she led me to the kitchen counter. I felt the voice of God. "I never said it was going to be a convenient ministry, Love (yes, God calls me Love). Ministry is messy and sacrificial. You were messy and look what I did with you!" I believe I heard Him chuckle. I looked at TJ who was looking at me waiting to hear what a wonderful thing she had done. Blue circled her lips, dripped out of her nose, and speckled her new white shirt. She was a mess; I was a mess and we were in the middle of a three room mess. . . and God said He could do something with this. I reprimanded TJ and together she and I cleaned up. There were two more of these incidents before the sun finally gave up on the day. I put her to bed, none too early for me, and I crawled back to mine and cried.